Why is My Ex So Angry?

Wednesday, 19 September 2012 21:11
Published in Blog

He broke up with me and yet he is angry? Why?

Usually the person doing the breaking up finds themselves very bitter and angry after a breakup even though this notion seems backwards.  (it is one of the mysteries and counterintuitve aspects of relationship coaching)

The person wanting to get back after a breakup suffers immediately from anxiety and panic.  This anxiety can create more problems for the person suffering love lose then humanly imaginable.  We have coached people who have said things to their ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend in this state of anxiety that has caused more problems then they ever bargained for and definetly hurt massive efforts for reconciliation.  When (not if) you are going through and find yourself suffering anxiety, please take the first step of recognizing that you are in an altered state based on circumstance and that any words or behavior from you while in this state will be most likely very detrimental to your chances of getting back together, at best, and at worst could have long lasting negative impacts that are hard to fix. We hear all kinds of stories (confidential of course) on this topic. 

Click on this link to learn more about coping with a breakup in a situation where one is angry and the other is anxious ....coping with a breakup

Are you Tired of Thinking About Your Ex?

Wednesday, 19 September 2012 17:42
Published in Blog

I am sick and tired of thinking about my ex even though I want my ex back...!?!

breakup heartache

Are you choosing to think about your ex and not move on?  Are you addicted to the thought of your ex to the point where it is keeping you awake at night?

Our clients call us with descriptions of thinking about an ex before they go to bed, in the middle of the night, and when they wake up.  

We coach on three different techniques if you are in this predicament. (all three methods are coached within the context of getting your ex back...)

1) Get Closure- for more information on closure, click on this link which is from the ZooMonkey system for reconciliation ..  http://zoomonkey.com/wp-admin/post.php?post=936&

2) Date others- This is real tricky if you but it can be helpful to some of our clients if done appropriately.

3) Immerse yourself in new hobbies and activities- This is very hard to do if you don't force yourself but it is very helpful if you can manage it. Also, meditation and focusing on those that love you are vitally important. 

Ask yourself if you are choosing to hold on to the old memories and your thought of the relationship. Are you idealizing your past relationship? Are you looking at your relationship through rose colored glasses ?

Do you believe that there are ways to control your thoughts?  Understand that we can only control ourselves and not our ex.  You do not own your ex nor does your ex "owe" you anything after a breakup.  If you try to guilt your ex back, you probably won't be successful.  Remember, you are not attractive if you are pining, whining, and overly emotional if you were just on the short end of a breakup.  

What are my chances of getting my ex back?

Thursday, 16 August 2012 16:43
Published in Blog

What are my chances of getting my ex back?


"Will my ex ever really get back together with me?  The chances seem real slim... ? :( "

We get this question all the time regarding odds, percentages and chances. 

The answer depends on three main factors: 

1) how long the relationship lasted

2) the reasons for the breakup

3) the type of breakup (situational/spontaneous versus planned and orchastrated over time.)

The rest of this article on your chances of getting your ex boyfriend and/or girlfriend back can be found here: zoomonkey

We know this is a tough time.We understand.Everyone makes mistakes in life but how you handle the mistakes is what counts.
Call us now to start fixing what went wrong.


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