Break Up Support

Break Up Support

"We are very proud of our ability to work with a myriad of breakup scenerios. If you don't get coaching from us, get coaching somewhere..." -Phil Richman

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Why is My Ex So Angry?

Wednesday, 19 September 2012 21:11 Published in Blog

He broke up with me and yet he is angry? Why?

Usually the person doing the breaking up finds themselves very bitter and angry after a breakup even though this notion seems backwards.  (it is one of the mysteries and counterintuitve aspects of relationship coaching)

The person wanting to get back after a breakup suffers immediately from anxiety and panic.  This anxiety can create more problems for the person suffering love lose then humanly imaginable.  We have coached people who have said things to their ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend in this state of anxiety that has caused more problems then they ever bargained for and definetly hurt massive efforts for reconciliation.  When (not if) you are going through and find yourself suffering anxiety, please take the first step of recognizing that you are in an altered state based on circumstance and that any words or behavior from you while in this state will be most likely very detrimental to your chances of getting back together, at best, and at worst could have long lasting negative impacts that are hard to fix. We hear all kinds of stories (confidential of course) on this topic. 

Click on this link to learn more about coping with a breakup in a situation where one is angry and the other is anxious ....coping with a breakup

Are you Tired of Thinking About Your Ex?

Wednesday, 19 September 2012 17:42 Published in Blog

I am sick and tired of thinking about my ex even though I want my ex back...!?!

breakup heartache

Are you choosing to think about your ex and not move on?  Are you addicted to the thought of your ex to the point where it is keeping you awake at night?

Our clients call us with descriptions of thinking about an ex before they go to bed, in the middle of the night, and when they wake up.  

We coach on three different techniques if you are in this predicament. (all three methods are coached within the context of getting your ex back...)

1) Get Closure- for more information on closure, click on this link which is from the ZooMonkey system for reconciliation ..

2) Date others- This is real tricky if you but it can be helpful to some of our clients if done appropriately.

3) Immerse yourself in new hobbies and activities- This is very hard to do if you don't force yourself but it is very helpful if you can manage it. Also, meditation and focusing on those that love you are vitally important. 

Ask yourself if you are choosing to hold on to the old memories and your thought of the relationship. Are you idealizing your past relationship? Are you looking at your relationship through rose colored glasses ?

Do you believe that there are ways to control your thoughts?  Understand that we can only control ourselves and not our ex.  You do not own your ex nor does your ex "owe" you anything after a breakup.  If you try to guilt your ex back, you probably won't be successful.  Remember, you are not attractive if you are pining, whining, and overly emotional if you were just on the short end of a breakup.  

Changes in Relationship After A Breakup | My ex is different.

Wednesday, 22 August 2012 21:17 Published in Blog

What Changes Occur After a Breakup? 

Everything Changes after a breakup. 

1) Expectations- No more daily expectations of displays of affection, obviously. 

2) Attraction- You are no longer together so do not expect the attraction between you and your ex to be the same.  This change is very difficult for people to handle.  Sex can be addicting, emotional attachment, co-dependancy, etc.  All of these things change.

3)Amount of credibility- Your ex may not believe a word you say after a breakup.  We find this to be the case since people often resort to long explanations and promises to change in order to reconcile.  This promise usually falls on deaf ears and by nature your word may not be as credible. 

For more information on the changes after a breakup , go to ....

Sex With My Ex. | Should I sleep with my ex?

Wednesday, 22 August 2012 20:33 Published in Blog

Should I have sex with my ex

Everyone that calls us wants to know when and how they can have intimacy with their ex. The answers totally and entirely depend on the situation first and foremost and a call into us is very necessary for this question to be answered based on your unique situation. 

Here are our general rules for having sex with your ex:

1)Gender- If your ex is female, it is most likely ok/good to have sex with her since the bond between females and sexual intercourse with her partner seem to be strengthened tremendously based on countless studies.  There are certainly instances in the reconciliation process where sex with your ex girlfriend is not recommended and you can find out by calling us if your situation is in this category.  However, as a general rule it is ok/good. 

2) Stage in the Reconciliation Process- Getting your ex back is a highly disciplined field and the timing is everything.  Regardless of gender, it depends where you are in the process to be certain if sex with your ex is ideal or actually acting as an impediment. 

For more information on sex with your ex, go to this link Having sex with your boyfriend or ex girlfriend.

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We know this is a tough time.We understand.Everyone makes mistakes in life but how you handle the mistakes is what counts.
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